Mindset Shifts for Success: Lessons from the Masonic Path

By: Martin Degas

The Craft, with its rich tapestry of allegory and symbolism, consistently champions the cultivation of character, self-mastery, and an elevated understanding of one’s place in the universe and society.

Success, within the Masonic context, transcends material achievement; it is measured by the perfection of the individual ashlar – the moral and spiritual self – and its harmonious integration into the grand design of humanity.

This article explores several crucial mindset shifts, inherent in and illuminated by Masonic teachings, that empower individuals to achieve not just personal triumph, but a more impactful, serene, and meaningful life.

These shifts, when diligently practiced, can lead a Brother to navigate the complexities of existence with greater wisdom, efficacy, and peace, embodying the very essence of what it means to be a Free and Accepted Mason.

Asking Questions to Understand Rather Than to Win Arguments

The true Mason, ever a seeker of light and truth, learns early in his journey the profound importance of humility and the pursuit of genuine understanding.

This foundational principle stands in stark contrast to the common human inclination to approach conversations with a combative spirit, driven by the desire to dominate or prove oneself right.

In the hallowed halls of the Lodge, where harmony and brotherly love are paramount, the purpose of discourse is not to win an argument but to illuminate, to learn, and to foster collective growth.

The Purpose of Asking Questions: Understanding vs. Winning

At the heart of Masonic interaction lies the principle of fraternal dialogue, where the pursuit of understanding supersedes the urge to conquer. Smart communication, echoing the Mason’s quest for knowledge, focuses on uncovering truth and achieving clarity.

When a Brother asks questions with the sincere intent to understand, he creates a sacred space of safety and respect for the other, making them feel heard, not challenged. This fosters genuine clarity, allowing the questioner to absorb information and gain perspective, truly apprehending the essence of what the other person conveys.

This approach is akin to the patient study of the working tools, seeking their deeper meaning rather than superficially applying them.

Conversely, the “judger” mindset, prevalent in those who instinctively debate to be right, is a significant impediment to progress and understanding. This closed-minded and critical stance, focusing solely on problems and individual vindication, leads to defensive reactions, negativity, and stagnation.

When the primary goal is to win, conversations become one-sided, unproductive, and potentially manipulative, hindering the very understanding and growth that Freemasonry encourages.

The pursuit of being unequivocally “right” often tragically overrides the importance of listening, escalating tensions and causing individuals to close themselves off, contrary to the open, receptive mind a Mason strives to cultivate. The very bonds of brotherhood are weakened when personal victory is prized over mutual enlightenment.

Why This Shift is Crucial and Beneficial

Shifting from arguing to understanding offers numerous benefits that resonate deeply with Masonic tenets:

• Builds Rapport, Trust, and Connection: Active listening, a direct consequence of asking questions for understanding, is fundamental for building rapport, understanding, and trust among Brethren. When a Mason truly listens with the intent to comprehend, it creates an unparalleled level of connection, making others feel valued, safe, and more willing to open up and share deeper insights. This fosters stronger relationships, both within the Lodge and in the wider world, strengthening the chain of brotherhood. It is an embodiment of brotherly love, relief, and truth.

• Reduces Conflict and Misunderstandings: A focus on understanding can significantly reduce conflict and misunderstandings. In Masonic discourse, it helps to defuse tense situations by prioritizing mutual respect and a sincere desire to find common ground, rather than directing dialogue toward a one-sided victory. This aligns perfectly with the Masonic imperative for harmony and peace among members.

• Enhances Problem-Solving and Decision-Making: Like the Master Mason who carefully considers every aspect of a design before laying a stone, leaders and teams – and indeed, individual Masons in their daily lives – who ask clarifying questions before jumping to conclusions can better understand problems, identify novel solutions, and evaluate alternatives. This approach encourages exploring ideas outside one’s comfort zone and challenging assumptions, leading to smarter, more comprehensive solutions and fostering innovation. It embodies the judicious application of wisdom.

• Elevates Conversation Quality: By encouraging active listening and seeking more information, clarifying questions improve dialogue and minimize misunderstanding, confusion, or ambiguity. They promote a fluid exchange and compel individuals to elevate original ideas, fostering collaboration and strengthening the collective intellectual fabric of the Lodge and community.

Strategies for Asking Questions to Understand

To effectively ask questions for understanding, rather than to win, a Mason can draw upon principles of self-discipline and intellectual humility:

• Cultivate Curiosity and an Open Mindset: Approach every conversation with genuine curiosity and an openness to learn, akin to the eager candidate seeking light. This means being ready to delve deeper and truly valuing others’ perspectives. Practice mindfulness to observe experiences without judgment, fostering an unclouded curiosity. Ask “Learner Questions” – open-minded, curious, and creative inquiries designed to promote progress, possibilities, discoveries, and solutions, such as “What are my goals?” or “What’s possible?” Avoid “Judger Questions” like “Who is to blame?” or “Why can’t they perform?”. Embrace uncertainty, viewing it as a rich source of potential learning that sparks curiosity and reduces hasty judgments. Actively seek diverse perspectives to broaden understanding and challenge your own assumptions, reflecting on hidden biases.

• Practice Active and Empathetic Listening: A Mason learns to truly “hear” the lessons imparted. This means fully concentrating, not passively “hearing,” but consciously exerting effort to hear the message being sent, listening with all senses. Be fully engaged, aiming to comprehend fully, rather than listening to respond. Employ empathy, understanding and sharing another person’s feelings, validating their emotions, and responding in a way that shows care and respect, tuning into both self and others. Observe non-verbal cues – body language, tone, stress, intonation – which provide crucial information. Resist the urge to interrupt or finish someone’s thoughts; allow them to express themselves fully, demonstrating patience and respect.

• Ask Effective Questions: Utilize open-ended questions that encourage comprehensive exploration and deeper insight, such as “How did you feel?”, “What did you think?”, or “How might we…?”. Focus on clarifying questions like “Can you tell me more?”, “What do you mean by?”, or “Can you give an example?” to ensure mutual understanding before drawing conclusions. Phrases like “Can you say more?” or “Is there more?” can drive deeper understanding and personal connection. Employ the Socratic “Five Whys” technique to uncover root causes and deepen understanding of intentions. Initially avoid probing questions that challenge views, as they can be confrontational and shut down dialogue.

• Embrace Silence: Silence is a potent tool for control and understanding, mirroring the solemnity and introspection often found within Masonic ritual. It allows space to think, calm down, and see clearly, leading to better decisions and avoiding regrettable statements. The intentional pause before reacting trains discipline and builds strength, as it takes effort to reflect and decide if speaking serves a purpose. Be comfortable with pauses; the best way to understand someone is often to give them space to think, feel, and articulate their thoughts fully. Strategic silence can prompt the other party to reveal crucial details or seek a resolution.

• Let Go of Judgment and Assumptions: Refrain from offering judgment on what others say. Avoid “reading between the lines” and making assumptions; instead, ask for direct clarification. Always assume positive intent when approaching conversations, a principle that underpins brotherly love and charity.

By diligently applying these practices, a Mason can transform interactions, moving from unproductive arguments to constructive dialogues that foster genuine understanding, strong relationships, and effective problem-solving, thereby reflecting the harmonious and enlightened spirit of the Craft.

Thinking in Terms of Systems Instead of Isolated Situations

The world, much like the intricate symbolic universe of Freemasonry, is not a collection of disconnected incidents but a vast, interconnected system.

To truly understand and improve it, a Mason must move beyond perceiving isolated situations and cultivate a systems thinking mindset.

This holistic approach is crucial for navigating complex problems, recognizing that every action has ripples, and every individual is part of a larger whole.

The very structure of the Lodge, with its interconnected officers and symbolic furniture, serves as a powerful metaphor for systems thinking.

What is Systems Thinking?

Systems thinking is a holistic approach to understanding complex problems by examining how their parts are connected within a larger system.

It views a situation as a cohesive group of interrelated and interdependent parts forming a complex and unified whole. It’s both a mindset – embodying curiosity, reflection, and seeing relationships – and a methodology that involves tools and practices like systems mapping and reframing.

In simple terms, a system is a set of things that work together towards achieving a mutual goal. This can range from the human body, a factory, or even a global network of Masonic Lodges.

Every system also exists as a part of other larger systems, emphasizing interconnectedness.

Key characteristics of systems thinking include:

• Holistic Approach: Problems are viewed within the context of the entire system, not just in isolation. A Mason understands that his actions affect his Lodge, his community, and ultimately, humanity.

• Interconnectivity: It focuses on the relationships and interactions between parts of the system. The working tools, for example, are not merely individual implements but are interconnected in their symbolic lessons to shape the perfect ashlar.

• Feedback Loops: It recognizes feedback loops that can amplify or dampen effects within the system, crucial for continuous improvements and adaptation. Learning from past experiences and adapting future conduct.

• Emergence: It understands that the system as a whole exhibits behaviors and patterns that cannot be predicted by analyzing its parts in isolation. The synergy of a well-functioning Lodge is greater than the sum of its individual members.

Why is this Shift Crucial?

Focusing on isolated situations (linear thinking) often leads to addressing only what is visible on the surface, akin to trying to cleanse a moral stain without addressing the underlying character flaw.

This approach is effective for straightforward, well-defined problems but falls short in complex situations where multiple variables interact dynamically.

The benefits of thinking in systems are significant and deeply resonant with Masonic principles of building a better world:

• Uncovers Root Causes: It helps identify the underlying causes of problems rather than just the symptoms. For instance, if harmony in a Lodge is disrupted, a linear approach might blame a specific individual, but a systems approach would analyze all interactions, communication patterns, and underlying grievances, leading to a more comprehensive and sustainable solution. This aligns with the Masonic quest for fundamental truths.

• Bigger Picture Understanding: Masons, as students of life, who can understand systems are able to grasp a bigger picture of what is creating and perpetuating problems. This allows for a more comprehensive understanding of the “problem landscape,” fostering a sense of responsibility beyond individual concerns.

• Effective Problem Solving: It helps identify effective leverage points that lead to solutions that are beneficial for people, animals, and the environment. This approach helps navigate complexities and make decisions that address the bigger picture, improving overall performance and contributing to the betterment of humanity.

• Reduced Complexity and Overwhelm: It provides tools and mindsets to approach complex problems more effectively, helping individuals and teams avoid feeling stuck or overwhelmed by the intricacy of systems. This contributes to the serenity and self-possession of a Master Mason.

• Continuous Improvement: True long-term thinking, a hallmark of Masonic progression, is about the cycle of endless refinement and continuous improvement, rather than focusing on a single accomplishment or isolated results. Results are not expected from doing something once, but from implementing a system that is repeatedly followed, much like the consistent application of Masonic lessons.

• Strategic Decision Making: By understanding how things around you interlink, you become better at seeing how items work together and how they can be manipulated, changed, or modified to your advantage. This enables strategic, well-calculated decisions, reflecting the wisdom and foresight expected of a true Brother.

• Enhanced Innovation: The ability to innovate within complex systems enables companies to deliver better products and services faster, giving them an edge in today’s evolving landscape. For a Mason, this translates to innovative approaches to charity, community engagement, and the perpetuation of the Craft.

How to Apply Systems Thinking

To effectively shift from focusing on isolated situations to thinking in terms of systems, several mindsets and tools are essential, echoing the practical application of Masonic symbols:

• Stop Thinking Linearly and Spot Patterns: One of the most important concepts is to stop thinking linearly and start to spot structures and patterns, like recognizing the consistent themes in Masonic symbolism. Linear thinking focuses on the symptom, not the underlying core problem. Instead of focusing on isolated failures, zoom out to see failures as feedback, patterns, and data, helping failure become informational and facilitating growth.

• Cultivate Curiosity and an Open Mindset: Systems thinking is inherently about curiosity, reflection, and seeing relationships, all virtues encouraged in the Masonic search for light. Embrace uncertainty as a source of potential learning, which reduces hasty judgments.

• Reframing Questions: At the heart of systems thinking is the powerful tool of reframing. Reframing is about changing how we look at a problem to expand the space of possible solutions. Often, we fail because we solve the wrong problem. Instead of asking “How do we reduce disputes in the Lodge?”, reframe it to “How might we foster stronger bonds of brotherhood and mutual understanding?” to open up a wider range of solutions. Ask questions like: “Instead of solving for this specific problem, what systemic issues should we solve for?”

Adopt Key Systems Thinking Mindsets:

• Zooming In and Out: Like a skilled architect reviewing blueprints, this mindset helps you see both details (zooming in) and the big picture (zooming out). It involves stepping back to look at a problem from a broader context or stepping forward to look at it in more detail. This helps to avoid over-analysis or getting lost in details.

• Shifting Perspective: This involves seeing a problem or challenge from multiple angles, akin to considering the views of Brethren from different backgrounds or degrees, which helps to break out of familiar patterns and gain insights you might have missed.

• Being Aware of Your Own Lens: Recognize that who is behind the camera matters. We all carry biases from our experiences, identities, and privileges. Use reflective questioning (e.g., “What are my lenses?”, “What assumptions am I making?”) to uncover hidden biases that might limit your thinking, promoting intellectual honesty.

Utilize Systems Thinking Tools:

• System Iceberg Model: A tool to uncover the systemic origins of problems and consider how systems are interconnected, much like understanding the hidden meanings behind Masonic symbols.

• Systems Mapping: Helps visualize complexity and guide where to zoom in or out to see patterns and connections. The map itself isn’t the solution, but a learning tool that facilitates understanding and helps situate questions in a broader system.

• Input-System-Output Model: Visualize how inputs are processed by internal systems to create an output (e.g., a candidate’s efforts and the Lodge’s teachings yield a more perfected Mason). To improve, focus on quality input and well-designed systems.

By adopting these mindsets and utilizing these tools, individuals and organizations – and indeed, the Masonic fraternity itself – can move beyond addressing symptoms to tackle the underlying structures and patterns that perpetuate problems, leading to more comprehensive, sustainable, and impactful solutions for the betterment of themselves and humanity.

Focusing Solely on What Is Within One’s Control

The ancient Stoics, whose wisdom often finds echoes in Masonic teachings, profoundly understood that peace of mind and true power stem from a diligent focus on what is within one’s sphere of influence, and a serene acceptance of what is not.

For a Mason, this mindset shift is paramount to cultivating self-mastery, inner tranquility, and effective action, moving from the state of a “rough ashlar” tossed by external forces to a “perfect ashlar” standing firm on its own foundation.

What is Within Your Control?

In Freemasonry, the emphasis on self-governance and the regulation of passions aligns perfectly with this principle. Things generally considered within your control include:

• Your thoughts, choices, and reactions: While you may not control which thoughts spontaneously arise, you absolutely control which ones you believe, repeat, and focus on. How you handle your thoughts – whether you entertain negativity or cultivate positivity – is entirely within your control. This is the inner work of polishing the ashlar.

• Your actions and efforts: This includes taking responsibility for your actions, a cornerstone of Masonic accountability and integrity. The diligent application of the working tools to shape one’s character is a direct manifestation of this control.

• How you speak to yourself: The internal dialogue you engage in profoundly shapes your reality and resilience. A Mason learns to build himself up, not tear himself down.

• Your mindset: This encompasses your attitude, perspective, and general disposition towards life’s challenges. This is the realm of fortitude, temperance, and prudence.

• Your energy and focus: You have full control over how you direct your energy, when you recharge, and how you preserve it during stressful times. A Mason learns to conserve his moral and intellectual energies for purposeful action.

• Setting healthy boundaries: This involves defining what you will and will not accept, protecting your personal space and well-being.

• How you handle challenges: Every obstacle is an opportunity for growth; your response determines the lesson learned.

What is Out of Your Control?

Many aspects of life are beyond your control, and trying to control them can lead to frustration, stress, and anxiety. The wisdom of the Craft teaches acceptance of the inevitable and focus on the improvable. Examples include:

• External events and what happens around you: Natural disasters, economic downturns, and the actions of others are often beyond individual influence.

• The behavior, opinions, and actions of other people: While a Mason can influence others through virtuous example and persuasive argument, he cannot control their free will. The acceptance of individual agency is key.

• The past: You cannot change it, and while you shouldn’t dwell on it excessively, your current actions can be taken with an eye to how they will be looked back upon. The lessons of the past serve to guide future conduct.

• The future: While some aspects of the future are within your sphere of influence and can be planned for (e.g., setting life goals), you cannot guarantee exact outcomes. The Grand Architect’s plan unfolds irrespective of individual desires.

• The outcomes of your efforts: You can put in the effort, but external circumstances might still influence the result. However, a Mason understands that diligence in effort is its own reward, and positive outcomes are often a natural consequence.

Why This Focus is Crucial

Adopting this mindset offers numerous benefits, deeply aligned with the Masonic path to inner peace and effectiveness:

• Empowerment and Resilience: Focusing on what you can control helps you build inner power and resilience, even in the face of systemic challenges. It allows you to channel your energy effectively rather than feeling consumed by helplessness, embodying the spirit of fortitude.

• Reduced Stress and Anxiety: Accepting that you can’t control everything can help you find peace of mind and relieve stress and anxiety. When you focus on your reactions instead of external stressors, your stress levels naturally diminish, promoting the serenity of a virtuous life.

• Effective Problem Solving: By clarifying what you can and cannot control, you become better at identifying the things you can change and then taking action. This leads to more strategic and well-calculated decisions, reflecting prudence and wisdom.

• Maintains Calm and Clarity: Filtering your actions by what is controllable allows you to maintain calm, clear, and consistent progress. The least reactive person holds the most power and control, a sign of true self-mastery.

• Increased Self-Efficacy and Well-being: A healthy “locus of control” (believing you can influence outcomes through your skills and work) is associated with being more successful, happier, healthier, more independent, and emotionally stable. It contributes to a deep sense of well-being and confidence, aligning with the Masonic goal of personal perfection.

• Avoids “Amygdala Hijack”: When faced with distress, the amygdala (the brain’s emotional center) can go into overdrive, making it difficult to think clearly. By focusing on what you can control, you prevent your brain from getting “scattershot” or narrowly focusing on the negative, which helps maintain cognitive control and rational thought.

How to Cultivate This Mindset

Shifting your focus to what’s within your control requires deliberate practice and specific strategies, mirroring the consistent effort required to progress through the degrees:

• Identify What You Can Control: Consciously ask yourself “What actions are in my control?” in any situation. This helps you recognize areas where you have choices, empowering you to act.

• Take an Honest Look at Sabotaging Thoughts: Recognize thought patterns that perpetuate helplessness, such as blaming yourself or others, or believing you’re a victim. A Mason takes responsibility for his thoughts and actions.

• Let Go of the Uncontrollable: Once you identify what you can’t control, make a conscious effort to let it go. As the Stoics teach, if it’s not in your power, it’s “none of my concern,” freeing up mental energy.

• Take Action on the Controllable: Choose to take action on one of the things you can control, even if it’s the smallest step forward. This builds momentum and a sense of progress, reinforcing self-efficacy.

• Practice Mindfulness: Focus on the present moment, your surroundings, and your feelings. This can distract you from uncontrollable worries and help you connect to your body, lowering stress levels. This practice mirrors the meditative quality often encouraged in Lodge.

• “Zooming” Your Perspective: When overwhelmed, broaden your perspective (zoom out) to see more possibilities and reduce stress. When you need to address a specific issue, narrow your focus (zoom in) to a specific, manageable goal, like carefully planning a single day.

• Reframe Challenges: Instead of viewing challenges as insurmountable obstacles, try to look at them as opportunities for personal growth and learning. Reframe your questions to expand your possible solutions, much like finding new interpretations in Masonic symbolism.

• Manage Internal Noise: Learn to quiet your mind through practices like mindfulness, meditation, and deep breathing to detach from racing thoughts, worries, and doubts. This is akin to finding inner silence amidst the clamor of the world.

• Self-Reflection: Regularly reflect on your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. This increases self-awareness, helps you understand your emotional responses, and enables you to align your actions with your values, a continuous process of self-improvement for a Mason.

• Be Assertive and Set Boundaries: Deal with problems head-on and communicate your needs directly. Learning to say “no” to distractions helps you prioritize what truly matters. You can observe others’ actions and opinions (out of your control), but you can set boundaries (in your control).

• Focus on Meaning: Acknowledge small moments of meaning throughout your day to build optimism and boost resilience, recognizing the sacred in the mundane.

This focus on an internal locus of control is a core teaching that empowers the individual. While it is a powerful concept, it requires consistent effort. A Mason understands that influencing others is not the same as controlling them, and the ultimate goal is to control one’s response to situations, not necessarily the situations themselves. This path leads to enduring peace and strength.

The Power of Silence as a Tool for Control and Understanding

Within the solemnity and contemplation of a Masonic Lodge, silence is not merely an absence of noise but a powerful presence, a sacred space for reflection, instruction, and profound understanding.

This deliberate embrace of silence, as a tool for both inner control and outward comprehension, is a mindset shift that profoundly enhances a Mason’s journey towards self-mastery and enlightened living.

Silence as a Tool for Control

Silence is far from a passive act; it is a strong discipline that builds mental control and emotional equilibrium. In a world saturated with constant noise and distractions, choosing silence is a conscious decision to reclaim personal power and moderate impulsive reactions.

Here’s how silence fosters control, echoing the Masonic emphasis on temperance and self-governance:

• Mental and Emotional Control: By practicing silence daily, a Mason builds the mental and emotional discipline that distinguishes calm, composed individuals from chaotic ones. It allows him to stay with his thoughts long enough to understand them, separating what’s urgent from what’s truly important. This self-control helps to avoid being swayed by fleeting emotions when things don’t go as planned or when faced with disrespect. When the mind is cluttered, actions can be impulsive; silence enables deliberate choices aligned with one’s values and long-term goals, aligning with the principles of the Square and Compasses.

• Controlling Reactions to Provocation: When provoked, choosing not to react is a profound sign of strength. A Mason understands that he cannot control what others do, but he can control whether he gives them his energy. Silence acts as a crucial pause for reflection, allowing emotions to subside and preventing impulsive reactions that could undermine one’s position or the harmony of a situation. This maturity means not attending every argument or feeling the need to explain oneself to every critic. It subtly disarms those attempting to provoke and demonstrates that they hold no control over one’s inner peace.

• Controlling Energy and Focus: Silence helps a Mason filter his life and choose where his precious energy goes, making him stronger in every area. It brings him back to himself, allowing him to pull energy out of draining arguments, drama, or spiraling negative thoughts. With fewer distractions, silence enables deeper focus and allows important cognitive processes like problem-solving and memory formation to operate at higher levels. Controlling one’s energy, especially under pressure, means recognizing it as a precious resource and consciously directing, recharging, and preserving it for constructive endeavors.

• Gaining Respect and Authority: Just as the words of a wise Grand Master carry immense weight, people listen more intently to those who speak less because their chosen words carry greater impact. Strategic silence projects an air of authority, confidence, and professionalism, compelling others to take one’s proposals seriously. It demonstrates self-control and emotional intelligence, which inherently commands respect. By speaking only when one’s words have real impact, a Mason stands out and gains deeper reverence from his peers.

• Strategic Advantage in Negotiations: Silence is described as a powerful weapon in negotiations, both within and outside the Lodge. It creates a subtle discomfort, prompts concessions, and influences dynamics, allowing one to gather information, assess the other party’s position, and formulate strategic responses. Leveraging silence can induce cognitive dissonance in the other party, compelling them to break the silence with concessions or valuable information, thereby swaying the negotiation in one’s favor.

• Filtering Actions: As discussed previously, silence supports the effective habit of filtering actions by control: if a factor is uncontrollable, one can let it go; if it is controllable, one can take action. This practice helps maintain calm, clear, and consistent progress. The least reactive person truly holds the most power and control.

Here’s how silence enhances understanding:

Understanding Others Through Active Listening and Observation:

• Active Listening: Silence is crucial for active listening, which is essential for successful communication and reducing conflict. It involves setting aside one’s own agenda to truly understand the other person’s perspective. Techniques include paraphrasing, reflective emotion, and asking open-ended questions to gain deeper insight into thoughts and experiences. Asking questions with genuine curiosity and then truly listening to the answer, even through silence, helps one understand the other person’s meaning, tone, and gestures.

• Observing True Behavior: Quiet moments allow one to observe people’s true behavior, not just their articulated words. When a Mason is not trying to impress or interrupt, he can keenly observe what people do when they think no one is watching and hear what they say when they believe no one is really listening. This involves reading body language, catching inconsistencies between words and actions, and recognizing patterns of behavior over time. This clarity helps identify who is genuine and who is merely pretending, protecting valuable time and energy.

• Uncovering Deeper Meanings: People don’t always say what they mean directly; true meaning is often found in silences, pauses, and subtle cues. Listening patiently and empathetically allows one to pick up on nuances, underlying messages, emotions, desires, and fears that might not be directly expressed. Techniques like “The Five Whys” can be used in conversations to uncover the core of what someone is saying or feeling, clarifying misunderstandings and discovering underlying reasons.

Understanding Oneself and Finding Clarity:

• Self-Awareness: Silence allows a Mason to sit with his thoughts and listen to what’s going on within himself. It helps him take responsibility for his mind’s workings, notice patterns, recognize triggers, and separate what’s urgent from what’s truly important. This self-awareness helps understand one’s own reactions, where one might give too much, or what kind of people drain or uplift. This is the introspection vital to self-improvement.

• Clarity and Purpose: By silencing the external clamor and internal chatter, one can gain clarity, uncover what truly matters, and distinguish between what is important and what is trivial. It provides space to reflect, incubate ideas, and recharge mentally and physically. In the absence of distractions, the mind becomes sharp and focused, allowing for greater insight in decision-making and a clearer understanding of true feelings without external influences. It helps reconnect with true desires and passions, strengthening one’s inner sense of Masonic purpose and moral compass.

• Reflection for Important Decisions: Before making important life decisions, reflecting in silence is crucial. It helps one step away from the noise, gather thoughts, and ensure choices align with one’s Masonic values and integrity rather than fears or external pressure. This practice avoids regret and leads to decisions guided by clear conscience and wisdom.

In essence, embracing silence is a transformative power that allows for intentional communication, deeper connections, and effective navigation of personal and professional challenges. It is a profound skill that requires consistent practice, pushing through initial discomfort, but ultimately leads to greater strength, discipline, and a life built on heightened awareness and truth, befitting a Master Mason.

Observing Situations Rather Than Reacting Impulsively

The Mason, ever striving for self-mastery and the careful application of wisdom, learns to govern his passions and to act with prudence.

This demands a crucial mindset shift: moving from impulsive reaction to deliberate observation and measured response.

This practice, deeply ingrained in the symbolism of the 24-inch gauge and the Trestleboard, cultivates greater control, profound understanding, and unwavering effectiveness in all facets of life.

The Distinction Between Reacting and Observing/Responding

The core difference lies in the intentional pause – a moment of self-control before action.

• Reacting is an instinctive, often emotional response driven by fear, anger, or panic. It is quick, simple, and frequently aims to resolve immediate feelings of angst or anxiety, neglecting future consequences. When we react, we are more prone to quitting, losing composure, or panicking. The brain in this reactive state prioritizes immediate emotional relief over long-term success or moral rectitude. It is the rough ashlar being battered by external forces.

• Observing and Responding is a more measured, deliberate approach, reflective of a Mason’s disciplined conduct. It involves slowing down, working through a situation, and evaluating it thoroughly before taking action. This approach allows for thoughtful responses instead of impulsive ones, bringing calm, clarity, and enduring effectiveness.

The moment you react, you lose power; the moment you pause, you gain it. This pause creates a crucial space between what happens to you and how you respond, which is precisely where your power, your free will, and your moral agency reside.

Why Observation and Responding Are Powerful

Cultivating the habit of observing and responding brings numerous benefits that are vital to a Mason’s progression:

• Gaining Control and Power: By choosing not to react, a Mason stays grounded and in the driver’s seat of his own life, demonstrating that external forces or the actions of others have no ultimate control over his inner state. This non-reactivity is a profound sign of strength, maturity, and self-respect, preserving one’s valuable time, peace, and energy from foolish battles. It helps to avoid being swayed by emotions, allowing for deliberate choices aligned with one’s Masonic values and moral goals. The least reactive person holds the most power and control, embodying true self-mastery.

• Clarity and Better Decision-Making: When a Mason observes calmly, his prefrontal cortex, the seat of logical thought, activates, enabling critical thinking, effective problem-solving, and strategic planning. This mental clarity allows him to weigh options, consider long-term consequences, and make informed decisions that lead to lasting success, rather than making hasty choices based on anger or fear. In the absence of distractions, his mind becomes sharp and focused, discerning what is important from what is trivial, leading to greater insight and wisdom. Observation fosters insight, and insight, rooted in understanding, always triumphs over mere impulse.

• Emotional Regulation and Breaking Free from Reactivity: Becoming an “outside observer” creates a crucial space between oneself and one’s emotional reactions, allowing for thoughtful responses instead of impulsive ones. This heightened emotional awareness helps identify triggers and manage stress, anxiety, and difficult emotions more effectively, mirroring the Masonic injunction to subdue passions. Techniques like “name it to tame it” (mentally noting or labeling difficult emotions) can reduce emotional intensity by up to 50%, bringing the brain’s frontal lobes back online for clearer thinking and responding with calm, clarity, and effectiveness. It’s about creating mental space to observe emotions without getting caught up or identified with them.

• Deeper Understanding of Others and Situations: Quiet moments, born of observation, allow a Mason to perceive people’s true behavior, not just their spoken words. He can discern what they do when they think no one is watching and hear what they say when they believe no one is truly listening, thereby revealing deeper truths. This includes learning to read body language and catching inconsistencies between what people say and what they do. This observational skill helps to discern who is genuine and who is merely pretending, protecting one’s time and energy from those who might mislead. It encourages reflective thinking and allows one to learn from experiences, fostering continuous personal growth.

• Enhanced Relationships and Communication: Observing rather than immediately reacting demonstrates self-respect and discipline, qualities that make one’s words carry more weight and earn deeper respect from others. When people notice a Mason is composed and not easily shaken, they listen differently and value his words more deeply, trusting him because his words are chosen with intention and wisdom. In emotionally charged discussions, taking a moment to breathe and reflect before responding helps to genuinely understand the other person’s perspective and respond thoughtfully, preserving harmony and fostering stronger fraternal bonds.

How to Cultivate the Skill of Observing

Developing the habit of observing and responding requires conscious effort and consistent practice, as reacting is often the default choice. This echoes the Mason’s daily labor to perfect his character.

Here are key strategies:

• The Intentional Pause: When feeling emotions rise, take a deliberate step back, pause for a few seconds, and breathe deeply to allow time to process the situation. This momentary pause prevents impulsive reactions, much like a careful architect pauses before making a critical structural decision. Count to 2, 3, or even 5 before responding in situations, providing a reasonable amount of time to make considerations and form a more firm and rational response. In negotiations, leveraging silence can prompt concessions and gather information, as previously discussed.

• Self-Awareness and Detachment: Practice mindfulness and meditation daily to train your mind to stay calm and create mental space for thoughtful responses. This helps identify triggers and manage emotional responses. Adopt the “name it to tame it” technique by mentally noting or labeling difficult emotions as they arise. This creates mental space to observe the emotion objectively, allowing you to respond with awareness, wisdom, and strength despite it. Becoming an outside observer is crucial for self-discovery, offering objective insight into your thoughts, emotions, and actions, reducing the influence of biases and ingrained reactions. You learn to view emotions with detachment, like a surgeon viewing a patient’s ailment. Review your impressions by immediately asking yourself: “An impression is…” This helps separate the event from your initial instinctive view of it, preventing impulsive assent to provocation.

• Shift in Focus and Perspective: Zoom out by broadening your perspective and attention from a narrow focus to a wider view. This “visual zooming” or panorama mode, by shifting attention to the periphery, can induce calmness and lower stress levels. It helps your brain see more possibilities beyond the immediate anxiety. Reframe challenges as experiments rather than problems requiring immediate solutions. Like a scientist or a Masonic scholar, observe outcomes to learn, fostering an open approach instead of assuming you have all the answers. Focus on what is within your control and let go of what isn’t. This filtering process helps maintain calm, clear, and consistent progress, preventing energy waste on uncontrollable factors like others’ opinions. The least reactive person holds the most power.

• Active Listening and Questioning: Listening is an active endeavor to understand, requiring engagement rather than being a passive act. Active listening techniques like paraphrasing, reflective emotion, and asking open-ended questions help you set aside your own agenda to understand others’ perspectives, reduce tension, and create a non-threatening space for communication. Cultivate curiosity by asking questions rather than making assumptions, transforming judgment into understanding and empathy. This allows you to say, “Tell me more about that,” seeking deeper insight. Ask clarifying questions to pause instead of jumping to conclusions, gathering more information, details, or context, and promoting positive intent. To truly understand people, stop trying to impress or interrupt them; instead, get quiet, sit still, and pay attention. This allows you to observe their true behavior and patterns, including body language and inconsistencies between words and actions.

• Strategic Calm and Critical Thinking: By intentionally cultivating a calm mindset, a Mason allows his brain to function at its best, clearing the “fog” for clearer navigation. Critical thinking involves analyzing information objectively, considering different viewpoints, and making reasoned judgments, which fosters understanding and empathy over bias. Situational awareness (perceiving and comprehending context) combined with critical thinking (systematic analysis and evaluation of information) forms a powerful synergy for informed decision-making, allowing one to actively shape outcomes rather than being a passive observer.

In conclusion, moving from impulsive reaction to deliberate observation and thoughtful response is a transformative journey that aligns perfectly with the Masonic path of self-improvement. It requires discipline and consistent practice, but it leads to a life guided by quiet confidence, heightened awareness, and purposeful action, allowing a Mason to navigate the complexities of the world with poise, strength, and an unwavering commitment to his principles.

Conclusion: The Architect of the Self

The journey through the degrees of Freemasonry is, at its heart, a profound exercise in self-mastery and the continual refinement of character.

The mindset shifts explored herein – from seeking understanding over winning, thinking systemically over isolated incidents, focusing on control, harnessing the power of silence, and observing rather than impulsively reacting – are not merely psychological techniques but fundamental principles deeply woven into the moral and philosophical fabric of the Craft.

Each of these shifts contributes to the grand work of “perfecting the ashlar.” By cultivating an open mind and a curious heart, a Mason learns to truly listen and understand, fostering harmony and truth within his Lodge and community.

By viewing the world through a systemic lens, he becomes a more effective problem-solver, recognizing the interconnectedness of all things and working towards holistic, sustainable solutions that benefit humanity.

By diligently focusing on what lies within his control, he achieves inner peace, resilience, and a profound sense of self-efficacy, knowing that his actions, thoughts, and responses are his to command.

Embracing silence grants him deep self-awareness, emotional control, and strategic advantage, allowing him to navigate life’s tumult with calm dignity.

And by consciously choosing observation over impulsive reaction, he gains clarity, wisdom, and the power to shape outcomes rather than being merely a passive recipient of circumstances.

These mindset shifts transform an individual from a mere participant in life’s drama to a conscious architect of his own experience.

They empower a Mason to exemplify the virtues he professes, to be a source of light and stability in a turbulent world, and to contribute meaningfully to the betterment of himself, his family, his Lodge, and society at large.

The success derived from these shifts is not ephemeral or material, but rather the profound, enduring success of building a better man, ready to stand firm on the square of virtue, and eternally pursuing “more light” on the path to becoming a true Master of his own destiny.

May every Brother strive to embody these principles, for in so doing, he truly lives up to the noble tenets of our Ancient and Honourable Fraternity.

The Square Magazine Podcast

The Square Magazine Podcast